common use for the word 'townie' in England is that which
describes a person.
A townie is normally aged between 11 and 15. Listens to so-called 'garage' music such as Blazin' Squad
and So Solid
Crew, neither of which
is REAL garage music; simply pop music with
a stammering kid in fake diamonds fronting the band.
A townie will
normally dress in grubby shell-toed Nike trainers, rolled-up Adidas tracksuit bottoms and an unmatching jogging
of the sex.
If female, the jogging
jacket will most
likely be pink or baby blue
for £5 at the local market
and will have
the word 'PRINCESS', 'BABE', 'BLING BLING' or 'FCUK' spelt out in white
across the front.
, the townie's jogging
top will most
likely be white with blue
sleeves, again purchased
for £5 at a market
; and will have
the name of an American city spelt out across the front, ie. 'BOSTON', 'DETROIT', or 'CUBA'; ..despite the fact that these
creatures are not intelligent
enough to know
where the places they advertise on their
chests are. Most
not even realize that 'BOSTON' is a city.
A townie will
often smoke because "it's alrigh', innit?". All townies own at least one item of clothing with
the disgusting beige/brown
Burberry print upon
it. Obviously, this garment is not genuine Burberry, and instead of the £400 charged for a real Burberry bag/scarf, will have
for £1.50 down the local market
A female townie will have poorly
dyed blonde hair with
split ends and two inch long roots, gelled
tight bun/ponytail held by a fake Burberry hair-tie. The ears will
also be adorned with
at least three
fake gold earrings ("only two quid
fer eigh' pairs dahwn
'a marke'") and will have
of acne, vainly covered
up by layers upon layers
of cheap foundation, blue
eyeshadow and neon blusher. Eyes will
also be caked with
and clumpy blue
not wear make-up, but will
a diamanté stud
in one ear and boast that he did it himself.
All townies look
A) is intelligent
B) has a future that doesn't involve the words 'McDonald's drive-thru'
C) owns an item of black clothing
D) doesn't listen to So Solid
E) doesn't smoke
F) doesn't have
G) shows ANY sign of refusal to conform to the masses; ie. INDIVIDUALITY.